An almost intelligent species believes
Three dimensions comprise the whole universe
How did we get this lucky?
Their feats first left us furious
Burning the land for agriculture?
Wiping out species you need to survive?
Treating your smarter half as slaves?
Then we made a small intervention
Sent extra-dimensional has-beens;
Humans made them goblins, ghosts, gods
Invented into religions, nations, civilizations
For thousands of years we laughed ourselves sick
Soon the Earth Show went galactic
Even ten-dimensionals came down from their heavens
Watching hapless, hopeless, deluded folk
Become more hopeless
We experienced the utility of stupidity;
Dumb is funny
Come film and television we tried some tweaks
Soon their “media” redid our best shows
Turning UFOs into mighty avatars
New gods who will provide
The happiness humans routinely discard
If there’s something humans want
They wreck it
You just have to laugh
Now some of their physicists know what’s up
Recognize three dimensions cannot
Scratch the surface of the information worlds
They wish to pierce the other dimensions
Could find us
They must be stopped
We’re grateful for great human allies:
Leaders who live to curtail research
Schools that ban dictionaries
Replace science with “creation science”
Dinosaurs and people tramping the earth together?
Human evolution doesn’t stand a chance
Idiocy originated long before Earth
Yet great practitioners stride its lands
Sure they’re the one intelligence in the Universe
It’s so delicious – what do humans say?
The show must go on